Strategic Serendipity

What will April hold for you?  No, I am not asking you to go read your horoscope, although for the record mine says I will not pay attention in the workplace this month (uh oh).  Seriously though, what will you do in April?  What do you want to do?  What will you make happen?  We've been practicing writing weekly goals, some we achieve and some we don't.  (I did not get 500 page views this past week for example.  More importantly, I know why I didn't.  Life happened and I did not put into this blog what I needed to get out what I wanted.  That being said...there is always this week!)  Let's take it a little bigger this week.  Sit down and come up with four goals for the month.  One for work (obviously mine will be to pay attention), one for family, one for self, and one wild card (it doesn't have to be wild, just your choice). If you need help coming up with goals, start by thinking about your core values ...which values do ...

Does sitting through a lecture, watching the news, or listening to a book on tape really reach you?  How about reading a newspaper, reading a book, or surfing the web?  Or do you do best through experiential learning?  Do you need to talk to others about concepts you've learned or reflect upon them individually? Leadership development begins with self-awareness - what are your strengths, what are your weaknesses, and how do you learn?  So many people want a checklist of what they have to do to advance in a career.  Leadership development is about increasing your skills and breadth of abilities.  It is not about the next job, it is about every position you will hold in the future.  So attending a class or reading a book because someone told you it will help you get a job is not leadership development.  It is the adult equivalent of teaching to the test. If you are really focusing on development, you'll pick out one to two competencies or ski...

We've discussed goal setting, but what do you do when you are hyper-focused on one goal and life hands you a curve ball.  The theory behind the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator says that some people can easily flex into the new priority (those with a Perceiving Preference) and some can easily stay focused on the original goal (those with a Judging Preference).  In Type Development, we want to learn to utilize the skills under either preference as the situation demands.  But how do you distinguish your preferred response and the response required by the situation? Ask yourself these questions to help you decide which path to take. 1.  Is the "curve ball" situation time sensitive? 2.  Is the original goal time sensitive? 3.  Do you have to choose one or the other or can you rearrange your timeline to accommodate both in a reasonable manner? 4.  Which one should logically come first? 5.  How will individuals around you be affected if you choose on...

Last week I challenged you to set weekly goals with me in my post Weekly Challenge - What Are Your Goals for the Week .  Did you do it?  My goal for the week was to get 275 page views for the blog this week.  To put this "stretch" goal into perspective, my largest month ever was 405 page views. I know you are on the edge of your seats and so ... you have to wait until the end of this post to see if I made it (and my new goal for this week). Once you have set a goal and an achieve by date, when you get to the date you want to review.  Did I achieve my goal?  If so, how can I continue the momentum or do better?  If not, what stood in my way?  Do I need to re-prioritize what I'm working on? So, join me this week with the Weekly Challenge - Goal for the Week (Part II).  Here are just a few things to keep in mind when you are setting your goal. What will you do?   By when will you do it? Can it be completed in that time?  If not, go...

Every year where I work there is a survey of employees to see how satisfied we are.  (It doesn't matter really where I work because most large organizations do this type of annual survey.)  One year they added a question, "Do you have a best friend at work?"  Honestly, I have always refused to answer this question because it is so poorly written.  Literally, your "best" friend is the one you like the best.  Of all your friends.  Do they want to know "Does your best friend work with you?" or, as I suspect, "Do you enjoy coming to work because you like the people with whom you work?"  Yes, I know there is research out there to support that people who have friends at work are more likely to stay there, but it doesn't have to be your best friend does it? That aside, I want to dedicate tonight's post to the people with whom I work (none of whom are my best friend).  The reason people are more likely to stay in a job with people they like...

How often do you change things up in your life?  Maybe something big like changing a job or something little like a room arrangement or your schedule?  I realize I am in about a six month period where I am playing with changes and finding things I like.   Part of it is trying to align my life more closely with my purpose .  Part of it comes from suddenly finding myself a single mother of a toddler.  And some of it is just plain making sure I am still myself and not just Jackson's mom. One example is that I used to volunteer 10-15 hours a week outside of the home.  This was extremely fulfilling for me and was one of the first things to go.  Now I realize I have a few hours after he goes to bed in the evenings so I am searching for (and finding great matches) opportunities to contribute my skills virtually. I also went from having a car to not in the split.  Now everywhere I go (daycare, shopping, etc.) involves walking and usually pushing a str...

Ferris Bueller said it best, "Life moves pretty fast.  If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."  Tonight as I sit here in a very quiet house while my son spends the week with his father, I know that reflection is a good thing.  To say the past two years of my life has been a whirlwind is an understatement.  But as I reflect back on my life today, I realize how much I have and how very lucky I am.  I wasn't unhappy yesterday, I just wasn't fully aware of how truly happy I am. If we can't even stop to realize whether we're happy or not, how do we make decisions that impact our lives and all those people who work with us and depend on us?  If you are not taking time to reflect at work, how do you know where you are, where you're going, and how you'll get there? Carve out 15 minutes in this week's schedule to seriously reflect on what you want to achieve in the next five years.  Make as many notes as you can during...

"When your monster wants to throw things and your monster wants to shout, there's a way to calm your monster, and chill your inner monster out."  We laugh when we play this for our young child and the cute little Elmo turns into a monster and we dance with our little one when Colbie Caillat melodically sings "Belly Breathe."   http://youtu.be/_mZbzDOpylA   Toddlers are notorious for meltdowns.  All the research says it is because they don't have the words to express their feelings and guide the parents to stay calm. But what about when you are at work and YOUR monster wants to throw things?  The Emotional Quotient Inventory (EQ-i), a popular emotional intelligence assessment, includes Emotional Management and Regulation as one of composite scales with Stress Tolerance and Impulse Control as subscales.  In other words, how well can you chill your inner monster out? In his book  Emotional Intelligence , Daniel Goleman, posits that 20 percent of an in...

We've all heard it - you are more likely to achieve a goal if you write it down and more likely still if you tell someone else.  It seems easy, right?  So why do we hesitate to write down and share our goals?  I can think of two popular ones right off the bat. If we say it out loud it won't come true.  We've all heard this one in some form or another, usually when  someone is expecting a new job offer or baby.  That little voice in our head says don't count your chickens until they're hatched.  Understood.  However, there is a difference between telling someone your goal is to get a new job in the next three months and telling someone that you expect to be working for X company by the end of the month.  I know setting SMART goals asks us to be specific, but in this respect a little vagueness is understood. If we don't achieve the goal we will be a failure in our own eyes and those of the people we told.  Rubbish.  I have a good ...

There is a lot of talk and writing around work/life balance, but what does it really mean?  As I pave my road of single motherhood, I have a different view than I ever have before.  For me, it now includes being able to do work I love, spending time with my child and helping him develop, and cherishing time for myself and fulfilling my own dreams.  While it seems so large, it seems within reach.  Part of it deals with organization.  I don't have to schedule to the point that my perceiving preference gets stressed out.  But I do have to prioritize tasks for the day and week.  Part of it deals with really knowing what is important to me and what is not.  And part of it deals with not feeling selfish for wanting it all. How do you define work/life balance and how do you protect it?

We all know people who spend more time telling you why they can't do something than they do actually doing it.  We also know people who try to please everyone and agree to everything.  Both are equally troublesome. So...for the next week, I am taking the phrase "I can't" and "Of course" out of my vocabulary and replacing them both with "I will."  What it means is that instead of immediately saying I can't or of course, I will think seriously about what I can do and commit to that affirmatively with "I will..." What do you think?  Join me in the challenge.  Let us know how it feels to make the shift.

I recently did an exercise where someone asked me to list my values.  I've done this with a list and without it.  For me, it is easier to start with a list and then whittle it down.  Basically I end up with wanting to contribute, be recognized for my exceptional work, and be a good and honest person.  These are my core values. We all have them.  They are those values that guide our actions and decisions without our really even thinking about them.  It is usually only when we are somehow asked to violate them that we realize how important they are to us. As children, it might be when all of our "friends" are picking on the kid in the class who is "different" and something inside of us wants to protect that person. As teenagers, it might be when our friends are pressuring us to drink, do drugs, or have sex and we decide that pizza and movies on a Friday night at home might not be the worst thing. In college, it might be when we really want to take tha...

I often hear from leaders that their employees seem to come to them to solve all the problems, send them in the right direction, tell them exactly what to do, etc.  In my mind I would hate needing to get that much sign-off from my boss, but I realize that it is a prevalent problem in the workforce today.  Here is a checklist to work through before you ask your boss for help. 1.  Standard Operating Procedure.  Is there one?  Have you checked what it says? 2.  Your notes from when you received the assignment.  What?  I cannot tell you how many people don't take notes when they are receiving a new assignment.  Yes, it is a lot to take in at once, that is why you write down your steps so you have something to go back to. 3.  Samples from prior similar assignments prepared by senior employees in the office.  I'm not saying plagiarize, but do you know the accepted format?  Does the boss like an executive summary up front? 4. ...

I am taking a class tomorrow - not teaching - taking!  And I am like a kid getting my backpack ready for the first day of school.  Notebook, check...favorite pen, check...lunch so I don't have to leave, check...diet coke and red bull to keep me focused, check... The beauty of lifelong learning is you always have that thrill of learning something new, stretching your wings, stepping outside of your comfort zone.  You've seen that medicine commercial...a body at rest will stay at rest.  I believe the mind is the same way.  (I know, there are lots of neuroscience books out there that say the same thing and give scientific data and proof.  But do you really need it?  Don't you know that feeling when you learn something new?  It has to be good for you!) So as I look forward to my day tomorrow, I encourage you to look at your schedule this week.  I am pretty sure you have a pile of articles and books (either actual or virtual) just waiting for ...

Authors Christine Koh and Asha Dornfest are about to release a fresh perspective on having it all by cutting out the "noise." The book will be released on March 19 and I'll write a full review when I've had a chance to read it. In the meantime, I invite you to join me in MinCamp! MinCamp is a 14-day challenge to move you in the right direction.  I just finished day 6 and I am feeling great about my progress.  The 15 minute challenges are just perfect for fitting in after the kids have gone to bed or during nap time.  Without giving away their process (seriously, click on the link and sign up!), I've had reflective time and action time that helps center me and give my actions purpose.  The actions are in small enough chunks that there is no inner pull to put them off until you have enough time.  The badges you earn after completing each challenge help you end the day with your own personal gold star.  Each day you will receive an e-mail from the authors ...

I was recently half an hour late to a Junior League of Washington meeting and a when I asked a question about something they had discussed earlier a friend made a joke about getting there on time.  Yes, within no time at all I realized she was making a joke and didn't worry about her.  The reason it hit home and I continued to worry about being late was that I was beating myself up inside about being late.  Her teasing comment was barely heard because of the screaming judgmental voice inside every single mother that says "you can't do this" or "you're doing it wrong." To give you a little perspective, let me give you an idea of what I needed to do to get to my meeting at 7:00 PM.  I needed to leave work at 5:00 PM, walk to a metro station, wait for the right train and take it to my station about six miles away, walk to my son's daycare to pick him up, get the feedback for the day from his teacher, on this particular day we had to find the shoe my s...

Somewhere along the way we have become extremely hostile to each other.  We are quick to blame others and constantly protecting our own back.  At work and outside.  I sincerely hope this is one of those "inside the beltway" things, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it is not.  Is it the pressure of a long-term recession?  Do we see those less fortunate than us and get angry only because we know how very easily that could be us in the blink of an eye?  Are we so insecure in our jobs that we will willingly and quickly throw a co-worker, team, or organization under the bus?   I am truly hoping that you will join me in this week's challenge and share your stories as comments below.  For the next seven days, seek out and seize an opportunity each day to surprise someone with a positive action.  Pay for the person's lunch in the fast food store behind you.  Give a co-worker positive feedback.  Tell a loved one how much you admire...